JCG receives a complaint!

To whom it may concern,

On behalf of myself and all of my staff can I make an official complaint re the smells coming from your cookery classes.

I am currently carrying out the renovation of a large house on New Zealand avenue, adjacent to the side of your school. We are constantly having to work on the property ( which has no windows fitted at the moment) with UNBELIEVABLELY nice cooking smells wafting through our job, it is hard enough under normal circumstances working on a site like this but your scrumptious smells ( baking, pizza, curry etc etc) make our job even harder given that all the boys are salivating constantly at the thought of the delights coming out of your ovens.

If I can ask politely if the girls can only cook when there’s an easterly wind so as to take the delectable aromas away from us that would be really appreciated, alternatively, we would welcome any leftovers that need to be quaffed.

Yours salivatingly
Dave Parker, Parker construction.

JCG's response:

Dear Mr Parker,

Thank you for your email and I can only apologise. At JCG we take all complaints very seriously and strive to have excellent relationships with our neighbours. I have spoken with our Food & Nutrition department and asked that our students prepare less fragrant and gorgeous food. Unfortunately I was told that our students are incapable of cooking anything less than loveliness. Please do ask your team to be resilient and I hope the wind blows in their favour.

In recompense, we hope your team enjoyed the complimentary lunch we sent over today. This is a one off and further complaints will not be met with such generosity as our budget does not stretch to cooking for neighbours' builders.

Yours,

Carl Howarth

Complainant's reply:

Mr Howarth,

I thank you for taking my complaint seriously as I do have the welfare of my men to think of.

We will in future try stave our thoughts of your gastronomic delights but, alas, I think this may fall on deaf noses.

Can you please thank the girls involved in the cooking and delivery of your generous luncheon , it was very much appreciated and went down an absolute treat.

Yours, very satisfied

Dave Parker